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Monday, August 26, 2019
Monday, August 19, 2019
Have You Found Your Ikigai?
Greetings
all!
Have
you found fulfillment in your life? Do you know where to search for it? Have you
heard about ikigai?
Read
on! I loved this article by Paula Rizzo!
Image and article from
“What
do you do in a typical week?
- Go to work
- Spend time with your family
- Read
- Meditate
- Have drinks with friends…
It’s
important to have a good balance of work and play, social time and alone time.
But at the end of the day, what’s it all for?
There
are hundreds of self-help books on how to find your passion or change career
path to something more inspiring.
But
as my friend Terri would say, window cleaners don’t have that job
because they have a passion for clean glass. There’s a certain level of
practicality to what we do as well as a need to be financially stable.
So
how do we find fulfillment?
The
answer can be found on a small Japanese island which is said to be home to the
largest population of people who have lived to be 100 years old.
This
is largely attributed to the concept of ikigai.
Okinawans
use it as their way of life and I was introduced to the concept as I’m doing
research for my new book, “Listful Living: A List-Making Journey to a
Less Stressed You”
Ikigai
is the joining together of four primary elements:
- What you love
- What the world needs
- What you are good at
- What you can get paid for
When
you bring together these four elements it leads to a feeling of fulfillment,
which increases happiness and longevity. To follow ikigai you don’t have to
immediately quit your job or make any other drastic life changes. Ikigai is
more about following the path towards your ultimate fulfillment.
So
how can you get closer to your Ikigai? Try to incorporate more of the following
into your day to day:
New
opportunities – A
large part of ikigai is the idea of following what brings you that sense of
fulfillment, by taking opportunities that match with the four tenants above.
You might take up dance classes. This brings out a talent you didn’t realize you had or could introduce you to someone who helps you with a new
opportunity. It’s not about taking on as many opportunities as possible but
simply seeking out the things that you enjoy.
Go
with your gut – Do
you ever have one of those days where you’ve planned everything out, but your
gut is telling you to go a different route? Sometimes that gut
instinct can save your life. Your instincts are there to lead you to
where you need to go. Much like seeking out opportunities, finding ikigai often
come from following an instinctive path, rather than doing what you feel like
you should be doing. Change should come from within not an external source.
Take
it easy – So you haven’t reached
your true harmony – or your ikigai just yet! And you might not get their next
week either. In the rush to find your fulfillment you could let life pass you
by. Trust that within time you will find what’s right for you. I worked for
nearly 20 years as a news producer before I changed direction and
starting teaching people how to build their media presence.
For a few years before I left Fox News Channel I had people telling me I should
go freelance, but I waited for what felt like the right time. I’m glad I did!
If you’re always looking to the future you can miss out on the now!
Have
you found your Ikigai?”
What did
you think? Drop me a line!
Monday, August 12, 2019
Be Kinder to Yourself
Greetings
all!
A
colleague recently shared a fantastic article By Deborah Grayson Riegel. A
quote at the end by author Ian Maclaren caught my attention: "Be
kind, for everyone you meet is fighting a hard battle."
But how
kind are we to ourselves? How much compassion do we give ourselves?
Deborah shares really good insights! Below is an excerpt from her article.
“If
you struggle with anxiety at work, chances are, you're also struggling with
adding insult to injury: The "injury" is the anxiety, and the
"insult" is being cruel to yourself about it.
You
probably wouldn't do this if your challenges were physical. Your struggles
with anxiety, stress, and overwhelm are no less worthy of a compassionate
approach than your struggles with any physical pain, strain, or illness. And,
considering how much our mental health impacts our physical health, I contend
that we give ourselves even more compassion.
While
compassionate acts can and should come from others, they can and should also
come from yourself. You are more likely to invite compassion from others if you
are caring and kind to yourself. And the inverse is true: if you reject
compassion from yourself, you're likely to reject it from others as well.
According
to Kristin Neff, Associate Professor of Human Development and Culture at the
University of Texas, Austin, self-compassion involves three
components:
- being kind and caring toward yourself rather than harshly self-critical;
- framing imperfection in terms of the shared human experience; and
- seeing things clearly without ignoring or exaggerating problems
People
who demonstrate self-compassion feel more socially connected, have greater
emotional intelligence, feel happier, hold a greater sense of self-worth,
experience healthier relationships, and have higher levels of life satisfaction.
They also experience less fear of failure, depression, shame - and yes,
anxiety.
Here
are eight ways to show yourself compassion in the face of anxiety at work:
- Recognize that what you're experiencing is real and that it hurts, and that it won't last forever.
- Give yourself credit for any and all positive changes you're making (no matter how small), especially if you're likely only to focus on your setbacks and struggles.
- Make only "micro-asks" of yourself for the time-being, like "get out of your office for 15 minutes and take a walk around the block".
- Talk to a professional and take medication if you need it, and judge yourself favorably for asking for help.
- Speak to yourself the way you would talk to your child or best friend - kindly, calmly, and with understanding.
- Share your current emotional state with someone at work with whom you feel psychologically safe, so that you don't feel like you have to hide it with everyone.
- Post sticky notes on your computer screen (or change your screen saver) with quotations that remind you to treat yourself gently, and with care.
- Forgive yourself for being imperfect - just like everyone else."
What
did you think? Drop me a line!
Monday, August 5, 2019
8 Is the Magic Number
Greetings
all!
When
is your next vacation? Is it a short or a long one? And do you actually need a
vacation?
William
Taft, the 27th president of the US, pondered exactly that in 1910. He thought that we might need a 2- or 3-month vacation “to
continue work the next year with that energy and effectiveness which it ought
to have.” (“How long should a man’s vacation be?,” New York Times, 1910, July 31).
First
things first – you DO need to take time off! Recent studies show that if you
do not take your annual vacation, there is an increased mortality risk.
But
was President Taft right? Do we really need 2 to 3 months to re-energize? How
long does it actually take to get into a vacation mode?
Well,
we now have the answer! According to a study published in the Journal of
Happiness Studies (yes, it is a real publication!), it takes at least 8 days to
forget about work-related stress.
What
I found interesting is that the enjoyment does not continue to grow indefinitely
the longer we are on vacation! In fact, longer vacations might be tapering off
the enjoyment level, and Day 11 is when one starts longing for the routine and
developing homesickness.
So
it seems the perfect length of a vacation is 8-11 days!
I am usually ready to come home after 10-12 days. However, I do feel that more research is
needed! So in the name of science (and for personal well-being), we should take
more vacations of various lengths!
Sources:
- https://www.rd.com/advice/travel/vacation-length/
- https://link.springer.com/article/10.1007/s10902-012-9345-3
What did you think? Drop me a line!
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