What is your love language?

Greetings all!

Recently a friend and I chatted about life over lunch. She is married and has a small child. She shared that she would love it if her husband helped more around the house – and then she said that this was her love language. Of course, I got curious!

My friend was referring to a theory popularized by Dr. Gary Chapman in his New York Times bestseller The 5 Love Languages: The Secret to Love That Lasts (he later wrote several more books related to the topic). According to the book, a person's love language determines how they want to be treated. 

Here are the 5 love languages in alphabetical order (a person usually has one primary and one secondary love language):

1. Acts of Service: Finding ways to help – so yes, vacuuming the house IS an expression of love! And don’t wait to be asked – just do it!
2. Physical Touch: Holding hands and giving a hug will go a long way. Salsa lesson, anyone?
3. Quality Time: Giving undivided attention and really being there!
4. Receiving Gifts: It’s the thought that matters, and a gift is a visual representation of love. This is not about materialism!
5. Words of Affirmation: Giving compliments and saying “I love you” more often!

TAKE TEST HERE: http://www.5lovelanguages.com/

We usually treat others the way WE want to be treated but that might create some issues.  If you want to hear “I love you” and hold hands, then your love languages are Words of Affirmation and Physical Touch. If your partner brings you flowers (Receiving Gifts) and then disappears into another room to finish a work project, you are not on the same page. If you want to talk about your day (Quality Time) but the other person is vacuuming (Acts of Service), you might not be communicating well.

My interpretation is this: we all want to be loved but how we want to be loved differs. Maybe discovering the other person’s love language and learning how to speak that language is one of the keys to a great relationship?

Take the test and drop me a line to let me know what you think!