It might have been... [Regrets, decisions, and the 10-10-10 rule that might help!]

Greetings all!

I recently came across this thought-provoking quote by John Greenleaf Whitter (I mentioned him in my “Don’t Quit” post):

(Image from https://www.brainyquote.com/quotes/john_greenleaf_whittier_385048)

It is from his poem “Maud Muller” about a poor young girl who meets a rich man on a summer's day. For a brief moment, they both imagine a life together and then go separate ways. You can read the full poem here:

http://www.poetry-archive.com/w/maud_muller.html

"It might have been" might indeed be one of the saddest sentences in any language!

We face a lot of decisions – some big, some small but majority of them are important to us – and oftentimes we cannot predict the consequences of our choices. How do we make a decision that we can live with and have no regrets? 

I actually ask myself, “Will I have any regrets later if I do (or do not) follow this path?” This question usually helps clarify my priorities. I was chatting about this with my Mom, and she mentioned the rule of 10-10-10 that she had heard about. Of course, I did some research!

Suzy Welch, former editor-in-chief of the Harvard Business Review, describes the 10-10-10 decision-making process in her book “10-10-10: A Fast and Powerful Way to Get Unstuck in Love, at Work, and with Your Family.” I did not read the book but here is the gist of it, according to Suzy’s article on Oprah.com (http://www.oprah.com/spirit/suzy-welchs-rule-of-10-10-10-decision-making-guide/all). She says:

“Every time I find myself in a situation where there appears to be no solution that will make everyone happy, I ask myself three questions:

• What are the consequences of my decision in 10 minutes?
• In 10 months?
• And in 10 years?”

 

(Image from http://www.suzywelch101010.com/)

You can also watch Suzy describe how she came up with the idea in this 5-minute video https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9azOzBb329E.

This is an interesting approach as it puts a timeline on the consequences of our decisions: right now, foreseeable future, and distant future. Suzy also says, “knowing your priorities may help you with the 10-10-10 process, but it can also help you discover them.” It also makes you stop and think, which might help with emotions, and prevent you from acting impulsively.

What do you think about this method? What helps you make a decision? Drop me a line!